I’ve really missed my Five Minute Friday habit and have missed all my FMF ladies, too…
Can’t wait to hop around and see all of your responses to this week’s FMF prompt…..“Here”
[Congratulations, Kate, on your one year anniversary of hosting FMF!]
Here goes with mine (bad pun intended!)…five minutes of free thought word association around the word ‘Here’…
Here I am. I’m here. Here in this physical place. Here in this moment. Here in this time and space. Here. Alive. Rejoicing at the beauty of life. The fullness of it all.
You know when you’re so sillily happy you can feel it in your chest? Like it’s about to burst out of you and spring forth to happy-fy everyone around you?
That’s how I feel today. That happy. And why? I don’t know. I honestly don’t know, but I’d like it to stay.
Life’s awful, downright horrible at times. Leading you down dark paths and round and round in spirals of negativity (Why, oh why, do our minds do this? Why?). But, you know, if you focus on the here, life’s pretty damn good.
I’m not where I’d like to be – in any sense of the concept – but I am here. I am alive. I’m healthy. I’m breathing. I can feel the wind on my cheeks and hear the birds singing outside and, you know, sometimes, sometimes, that’s enough.
I have this unrelenting desire to strip my life back to simple. Simple surroundings. Simple interactions. Simple tasks. Simple. It’d allow me to be more here than I am now. To appreciate the here, the now. Simple is calling me, calling me to clear my mind, to make space, for thinking, for reflection.
For big things that are coming. [I feel them coming, even if I can’t yet see their shape or feel their form].
We know what we need even before we realise it (our ‘deep’ me, she’s wise. Wise beyond words). These urges, these yearnings, in our bodies, in our chest, at the back of our minds, they speak volumes about how we should be handling our here, our now.
For what more do we ever have, really, than our here, our now?
I listen, deep down listen, and I hear it. I hear the peace, the silence calling me, waves, waves of calming confidence, the sands (of remorse, of self-blame) slipping back, trickling, shimmying, dancing along in the waves, with the waves, being pushed out, out to sea.
“We don’t want you here” call the waves…my thoughts, my doubts, my fears, washed away, washed clean, brought back to me wholesome, fitting, full of hope (for hope is bigger than any fear). Big mountains become river stones with the passing of time. The shingle noise as I see bits of my fear-based thoughts gliding back to me, velvet soft the waves as they hand me back my thoughts, washed clean, returned, fresh, refreshed, sparking, ready to be used as fuel for onwards, upwards, to Better.
Here. Now. It’s all we have. All we can ever count on.
Savour. Delight. Turn down the complaints, the rancour, the negative.
Turn up the joy, the calm. Enjoy the sheer ‘here- and now-ness’ of it all.
Smile, dance, jump, jump around with joy (Let your joyful thoughts loose, even if it’s only in your head).
You’re alive, goddam it. You’re alive!
Let the sea enter, let it do its job and leave you refreshed.
Let it enter and wash you clean.
““If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change” – Buddha