Joining in with Five Minute Friday again. This week’s word: weary.
“…having one’s patience, tolerance or pleasure exhausted”
“…feeling or showing tiredness”
“…physically or mentally exhausted by hard work, exhaustion, strain”
From the definitions, there doesn’t seem to be much that’s very positive about weary, and having lived through weary-making times myself, I can vouch for that fact. There is indeed very little that’s positive about weary.
But the little positive there is is enough. Enough to teach someone who’s been to Hell and back, several times, that weary is a worthy ride, perhaps an even more worthy destination.
When you’ve ridden the Weary Train and arrived at Chronic Weary, you’ll see life at it’s worst. You’ll experience people at their worst. The entire human race will seem ugly, brutal. You’ll feel beyond hope, the shocking nature of it all will leave you reeling, looking for a North (any point, really, to cling on to).
You’ll drag your weary body around, your weary mind not even hoping to make much of anything and then you’ll catch a drift of something. A sign, a ray, a chirp, spark. (What is that? God? Life force? The energy that Buddhists tap in to?)…
Whatever it is, it’ll grab you and shake your weary ass until you awaken just enough to be able to see again. It’ll help you pop on your rosy glasses and you’ll slowly find small things that’ll pull you out of your weary state.
A flower. Raindrops. A smile. A small kindness.
You’ll use them, feed on them, your weary body growing strong, again, from them as your weary mind tries to process it all.
And slowly – very very slowly – you’ll see the value in weary, feel ashamed you even doubted, find nourishment in the strength of the human spirit that lives inside you…and you’ll start to believe there is a way out, that there is light at the end of the tunnel…
That life is worth it, that someone has your back, that there is beauty to be found everywhere, even in the darkest most desolate times.
Your journey hand in hand with weary – to weary and back – will tell you all you need to know about life and purpose and what it means to be good.
In the end, you’ll be thankful for the path you had to follow, and for the timing of it, because it taught you things you needed to know (reminded you that you have to be humble to be able to learn and that life is a learning game, if nothing else).
I’m tired most of the time. Strained (I guess the word would be). Unsure. Confused. Lost. Isolated. Alone.
But, you know, weary has taught me that those aren’t bad states to be in, or bad emotions to have: they’re simply temporary states that I have to move through. If I’m wise, I’ll learn from them and move on, stronger, more fully equipped.
Weary: a sage old companion ready to teach us more than a lesson or two about humility, patience and the value of reflection…
I’d rather not have come to know you, weary, would rather not have travelled with you, but I’m glad I did.
You taught me more than my joy-filled times ever did and for that, I’m thankful.
[Thanks so much for all your good wishes…everything’s been signed and I’m able to sleep that much easier at nights now. Phew!…..I’ll be back to ‘normal service’ here on I Will Bloom shortly and will also be back commenting on everyone’s blogs shortly too! (I’m not able to comment on Blogger blogs at the moment, for some reason…will try to sort the problem at the weekend…..)]